Mother's Day 2010

All weekend David kept telling me that he had not had time to get me anything and was really worried. He said one thing, really really small, to which I said, "You always say that and you are always lying" to which he gave me a really bugged look... what if this time he was serious? I didn't want him to feel too bad... (ok I totally would actually, but he actually did great so no worries).

Well, I heard David and Ethan making breakfast early Sunday morning, and because of the rough night sleep, I just hid under the blanket and fell back asleep. I was not in the mood... then I remembered last years Mother's Day. I was grumpy... and bugged. I had expectations... some were met and some were not. The day started out ok, and went south in the afternoon. And here I was grumpy again because I was so tired. And then I remembered- I am a Mother.

I had a friend last week say, "Is it so bad that the one thing I want for Mother's Day to to be away from the people who call me Mother?". Another and I were talking about our favorite time of day being at night when they all are asleep. Motherhood is tiring. Monotonous. A constant battle for me... listen to the whole story, even if it is 22 minutes long; don't yell, don't yell, don't yell... they are almost in bed; don't sweat the small stuff, people are more important; I am so sorry I ________!!!;

Yet nothing is so wonderful, so satisfying, so heart melting, so slobbery, so fulfilling and motivating and hopeful as being a Mother. I love it! I am thankful every day multiple times that I have the opportunity to be ... a mother! Being a wife and mother are by far the two roles I hold dearest, and the ones that make me happiest. I am stretched and beaten down countless times, but I would not get up and try try again (HELP ME!!!!), if it were not for these I hold dearest.

This year Mother's Day was wonderful... even though I was the only one awake at my house by 7:30 pm. (Dave did wake back up a bit before nine). I thought about being a mother, and read about being a mother. I want to be deliberate, to help them find and create their dreams, to be so busy living and loving, that I don't have time to get mad (until tomorrow when they won't clean their room after I have asked 76 times). To be focused on the blessing of being a mother. I love it. My expectations were not high this year, and they were more than met.

We also went and saw my angel mother. She is amazing to me. I don't have her temperment. I wish I did. I don't have here patience, her listening ear, her calm nature, her controlled tongue- I wish I had all these qualities. I never remember her getting mad at me in my entire life. She tells me it is selective memory. I think of her often as I am mothering our children. Do-bi-do bi- doo she hums still as she goes about her daily tasks. I am thankful for her, and have high hopes of developing part of one of her qualities I mentioned above. Do-bi-do-bi-dooo. Just need to start humming. Happy Mother's Day!!!